Stop Over-Glorifying Youth (Please!)

Processed with VSCO with hb2 presetHi! Remember me? Good. I’m back to rant about something that has been bothering me lately. Ready? Okay, let’s go.

If I had a dollar for the number of times someone has said to me, “You’re so young! The world is your oyster! Oh to be young again!” or some other wistful, care-free cliché, I would have approximately 105 dollars. Which isn’t even enough to replace the breaks of my Honda. But still, it’s a lot.

Our culture is obsessed with youth. We glorify it like nobody’s business: young love, beauty, sexy bodies, travel, wanderlust, wild spirit, no responsibilities, spring break in Cabo, nary a care in the world. The list goes on.

Well, I am almost 24. I have been out of college for two solid years. And I want to tell you that being young is not. always. that. fun. Examples for your review:

-Need a job? Not enough experience.
-Need professional clothes to get said job? Not enough money.
-Not sure what you want to do? There are millions of options to disorient you and confuse the living daylights out of you until you have decision fatigue and are paralyzed.
-Who are you going to marry?
-Student loans. Yeah.
-Where should you live? Choose wisely, because it will “set your path”…
-An old lady at church just asked if you’ve graduated high school yet…
-Here’s another UNPAID internship (AKA slave labor) to “build your resume”.

Being young has less responsibilities than, say, being a parent. I’ll give you that. But it also has far less stability and support. No one else is going to get the groceries, not even once. It’s all you. I have moved seven times in the last six years. It’s exhausting. But you know what’s more exhausting? Trying to buy into the youth-glorifying culture that our society sells. I get caught up in what people think I should or should not be doing. I have friends that say “You shouldn’t tie yourself down! Just be single and go backpacking through Europe for the next five years! It’ll be great!” Then other friends who say, “You should start your career already! You’re behind the rest of us who jumped in the day after graduation.”

I honestly don’t think there is a right or wrong. Everyone has to struggle through this decade of immense transition and change. I just wish older people would stop making me feel bad for not enjoying it all the time. Because the truth is, there’s a 99.99% chance that if they could push a button and go back to age 24, they wouldn’t! My mentor and friend in her 50’s, when asked, said, “I do not envy you! So many big decisions to be made at your age. I wouldn’t want to go back.” WORD.

Listen, I know getting older has its negatives. No doubt. I’m just saying that every age and stage of life, without exception, has its negatives. And I want to work to change our culture to one that is more open and honest about those challenges. Maybe this blog post can make a dent in the conversation.

Are you with me? Let’s start together.

 

Hello from Texas

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Hello from the great state of Texas. I am readjusting to America day by day: free water, small talk, giant trucks everywhere! It’s been so nice to spend time with my brother and boyfriend. My parents return from their travels on May 8th and I can’t wait to see them too. These photos were taken on Easter. Don’t these guys look handsome?! Anyways, that’s me, folks. Leave me a comment about what’s new with you these days!

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Dutch Tulips with Mom and Dad

Have you ever been to the Netherlands? I have been twice before, but this time was extra special. My parents picked me up in Münster and whisked me off to the tulip fields across the border. I don’t have a particularly green thumb (re: black) but I can appreciate gorgeous flowers as much as the next person. And man, these flowers inspired me to plant my own! These photos were taken at the Keukenhof garden, which is basically Disneyland for flowers. I was awe-struck and couldn’t help saying “Look at that, Mom!” around every corner. Below are a few photos if you’d like to see.Dad thoroughly enjoying the tulips…All in all, an inspiring visit! I’m off to purchase gardening supplies…

Goodbye Germany! (for real this time)

img_3080If you scroll through the archives of this blog, you will see several posts with titles similar to this one. I think I’ve said goodbye to Germany at least four times without knowing if or when I would return. But each time I knew I wanted to return, so I pushed to make it happen: I connected with a family to work as an Au Pair, I found an internship, I applied for a Fulbright and then a graduate program. I knocked on doors (or kicked down doors) to get myself back across the pond. I have not one, not two, but three visas from the German government. They’re probably like “Really, this girl again?!”

I say all this to show what a big role Germany has played in my formative years. I grew up a lot here. This country has taught me so much, and for that I am forever grateful. I have friends here who I know will always welcome me with open arms and host me on their sofas when I visit.

But I feel so much peace about saying goodbye. Once I made the decision to leave, I’ve felt zero regret or doubt. This time I am saying goodbye without the intention of finding my way back. Sure, I’m young and who knows where life will take me, but I am thrilled to live near family and friends in my home culture. I can’t wait to start my career and make friend and call people in the same time zone.

So goodbye, Germany (for real this time!). You have been true to me and of me. Thank you for everything.

 

How I Met My Boyfriend

dba90e31-5112-4655-b0f7-480512fb0cefFor some reason, I really enjoy hearing about how people met. Like, it brings me an absurd amount of joy.

So, dear reader, I will recount for you how I met my boyfriend, Trey. This is partly for your enjoyment and partly so I don’t forget any of the details!

I had just finished my Fulbright and was living with my parents in Fort Worth for the summer. I had was waiting to hear whether or not I had been accepted to the graduate program I’d applied to. Since Fort Worth is not where I grew up, I didn’t have any many friends there. I decided to download an online dating app mostly just to laugh at the Texan cowboys’ profile pictures with their camouflage outfits holding a fish they’d recently caught. I’m an LA snob, I know.

I went on one date that was mediocre. Then I swiped upon Trey’s profile. He was cute. I liked his glasses. He went to Baylor University, where my little brother currently goes. I messaged him something casual: Hey, my brother goes to Baylor.

Genius.

He wrote back and we ended up discovering that we’d both taught English abroad– him Spain, her Germany. We decided to meet up a few days later (jokingly at a German/Spanish fusion place).

We met at a cafe called Black Walnut. It was a nice place, but casual. I was so nervous I changed my shoes two times in the car!

The first few minutes were a bit awkward as is usual with online dating, but soon we got into discussing our mutual childhoods in the church, funny youth group culture, teaching abroad, going to small christian liberal arts colleges, having two siblings, and so much more. We had a lot in common…

The date was off to a great start but we were done with our food. So we decided to continue at a local coffee shop. We drove over there, ordered and sat down. After about five minutes, I see a woman walk past and I say, “That’s my mom.”

Yes, my mom had accidentally wondered into our first date!

She was so embarrassed haha. She drank her drink in the corner and left ASAP like a trooper. Luckily Trey thought it was funny and not too creepy.

My house wasn’t far from the coffee shop so Trey walked me home afterwards. It was sweltering Texan heat, and the poor kid had to walk back to his car drenched in sweat. The things we do for love!

We decided to go out again later that week and I said goodbye. On the other side of the door I remember smiling and thinking, That was the best first date of my life.

It was. And every date since has only been better 🙂

The Greek Island of Aegina

6E2C030B-91C2-47AB-A56C-F70F42DD41DC.jpg9C601C4B-5003-452B-8216-C268340620EF.jpgB6B0EB3A-9910-4E5C-8021-0CBD0471BFF1.jpgA6CC1EE9-2790-4DB2-A1DB-7256C3441FF4.jpg09D7BDEA-BCD0-4C86-9AD4-D6AC8A77CC89.jpg0108655D-3885-4D81-88BD-28F370C8FF00.jpgIsn’t it dreamy? It’s a 40 minute ferry ride from Athens that I just couldn’t pass up. If you are in Athens I would definitely recommend this day trip. It was pretty affordable and the ferry ride itself was also beautiful. I felt like I was the character Lena from The Sisterhood of the Traveling Pants! The water was gorgeous and the atmosphere was relaxed. I think I could get used to island life ;p